Category Archives: Hebrews 4
Fine is Not So Fine
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“26 But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. 27 The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash” (Matthew 7:26-27 NIV).
The man in the verse above was fine. He found a fine spot on the sand to built his fine house and live his fine life. His life was fine, maybe even good, on the surface.
Until one day “the rain came down … and the winds blew and beat against that house”. And suddenly everything that was fine “fell” and toppled into indistinguishable rubble.
When fine was hit be adversity
When fine was challenged by calamity.
When fine was pounded by trials.
Fine was destroyed, “and great was its fall” (NKJV) into ruin.
So, why would we want or choose to live a life that is fine?
But we do. Most days. When someone asks us how we are, what do we usually say? “I’m fine.”
Even when we are stressed.
Even when we are tired.
Even when we are sick.
Even when we are hurting.
Even when we are mad.
Even when we are sad.
We say “I’m fine.” But we’re not.
So, why do we pretend?
Why do we try to cover up?
Why do we deny?
Why do we lie?
We’re not fine.
Our lives are in chaos.
Our emotions are out of control.
Our thoughts are confused.
We’re not fine. And we need to have the wisdom to see it and the courage to admit it.
To ourselves.
To others.
To God.
“God, I am not fine.”
“God, this is so not fair.”
“God, I am not going to survive this.”
“God, it is too much.”
“God, it is not enough.”
“God, I just can’t ….”
“God, it hurts beyond words.”
And until we can be honest enough to admit we are not fine, it won’t get better.
There is good news. We can bring all of our not fine – our pain, our anger, our mistakes, our excuses, our lack of faith – to God. And He promises not only to understand our struggle but also to help us get through it in one piece.
“15 For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need” (Hebrews 4:15-16 NKJV).
We have a Father who sympathizes with our struggles and has compassion on us in our confusion. We have a Father who sees and gives mercy to us when we are tested and tried. We have a Father who never wonders at our weaknesses or falters at our feebleness of faith.
So, why would we choose to merely be fine?
It’s a waste of our time.
It’s a waste of our energy.
It’s a waste of our resources.
It will never help us.
It will never challenge us.
It will never lead us to our purpose.
But God will.
God has called us to be parrhesia (par-rhay-see’-ah) – Assured. Bold. Confident. Free. Outspoken.
And in letting go of fine, we are able to find cháris (khar’-ece) – Graciousness. Divine influence upon our heart. Acceptance. Benefit. Favor. Liberty. Thankfulness.
So, don’t continue to be fine.
Don’t live in the rubble of the collateral damage of the chaos.
Don’t live as merely a survivor who is barely alive and hardly getting by.
Don’t live weighed down with the shame of past choices.
You will miss out on God’s best for your life.
Because you allow your sin / circumstances to drag you down into hopelessness and sorrow.
Because you allow your sin / circumstances to pull you into disaster and destruction.
Because you allow your sin / circumstances to consume you with pride and self-reliance.
Choose to admit you aren’t fine and your circumstances are hard.
It’s the beginning of finding God’s strength to get through and triumph.
It’s the beginning of letting go of control and allowing God to lead (and to bless).
It’s the beginning of new possibilities and new outcomes from One who still works miracles.
It’s the way to find the life you want.
“Life … more abundantly” (John 10:10 NKJV).
“Life … in abundance [to the full, till it overflows]” (John 10:10 AMP).
“Life … in its fullest” (John 10:10 CEV, TLB).
“Far more life than before” (John 10:10 Phillips).
“Real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of” (John 10:10 MSG).
“Life … to the full” (John 10:10 NIV).
“A rich and satisfying life” (John 10:10 NLT).
So, let today be today that you choose to be more than fine. Let go of your fine and lean into He “who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine” (Ephesians 3:20 NIV) with what we willingly give Him.
Marie Fremin. 11/8/19, 1/19/20.
Grace: God vs. Man
I have been thinking a lot about grace recently. Apparently, a (big) life change will lead you down that road.
Three weeks ago, I was dealt an unexpected blow. No, I didn’t see it coming. No, I didn’t know it was being planned. No, I didn’t expect it. But did it break me? No! Because as I sat across from someone who defined me by a self-proclaimed stereotype a long time ago and refused to let it go, I was overwhelmed by God’s grace. I immediately saw the hand of God on my life and realized God was at work to remove me – with blessings – from a situation that had never been healthy for me. And internally I smiled and praised, because God’s grace produced such peace in me. I was good – no, I was great – in the middle of this sudden life twist. How? Because God reassured me He is with me (always) and was closing out this season according to His purpose. And I have the hope that He was already working out the new season of His plans for me.
God’s grace was at it always is – present, peace-full, and perpetual.
Man’s grace, however, once again showed up for what it often is – judgmental, contrary, and specifically limited.
And as I think about my recent days and ponder people versus God when it comes to grace, it becomes abundantly clear that while God’s grace is readily available, man’s is not. And rarely will man be so carefree with his grace as God is.
Because we as humans feel like we cannot freely give grace.
We have to hoard it.
We have to withhold it.
We refuse to give it.
We dole it out in portions that satisfy us and our stereotypes.
So freely we take grace from God. Yet so easily we refuse to give it to others.
But WHY?
Why do we choose to be caustic, cautious, careful, and casual about giving grace? Is it because we sit in judgment of people based on our goodness and standards? Is it because we are fearful God will punish us or won’t “refill” us for giving away what He gave us? Or is it because we are drawn to disobedience and going our own way?
Ouch!
And then I wonder. I wonder how someone can look you in the eye and call you worthless, no matter how hard you work. Judge you as trouble, no matter what the evidence says to the contrary. Allow someone to yell at and revile you publicly (and loudly) without consequence. And all the while unapologetically demanding respect – and grace – in return.
And through it all, I am really expected to extend grace? YES. Because God extends grace to me. When I least deserve it. When I’m at my worst. When I could care less who I hurt.
God is never like man with grace. He’s never cautious or hesitant. He’s never careful. He’s never casual. He’s never caustic.
He gives grace freely and fully.
When we ask.
“Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need” (Hebrews 4:16).
We can come without hesitation, without fear, and without shame to His “throne of grace”, to find the freedom and healing we need – whether we have withheld grace or had grace withheld.
So will you be humble enough today to seek and ask God for the grace you need?
Marie Fremin. 5/19/18 and 6/7/18
Judgment
“Do not judge, or you too will be judged” (Matthew 7:1 NIV).
Do you know why Jesus commands us not to judge? Because it HURTS.
Judgment is not fun, and feeling someone’s criticism, condemnation, or careless words can break our hearts and possibly falter our faith. Because judgment goes to the core of who we are – our identity, our ideals, and our integrity – and proclaims we have failed. And who likes to feel like a failure?
Don’t get me wrong. We all make mistakes, and hopefully we all learn and grow from them. They are necessary to help us see when we have done, thought, or gone wrong. They should help us do better, speak kinder, and love easier. We should not feel like a failure in these instances – because grace will come in and pick us up and point us in the right direction.
What I am talking about is …
Feeling the weight of someone’s (harsh) opinion pushing you down.
Battling the emotions of someone’s (careless) words defining your character.
Walking through people’s (uninformed) assumptions about your motives.
Judgment.
To be assigned value possibly contrary to your character and core.
To be pronounced not good (enough), possibly without insight into your motives and methods.
To be critiqued and found guilty, possible based on inconclusive evidence.
To be criticized as wrong, possibly based on impossible or unchecked standards.
To be judged. When you feel its weight – when your character is questioned and your integrity is challenged – it can break your heart.
Like it broke mine yesterday. When I found out my subordinate went to the owner because she was concerned I was acting irresponsibly over payroll. No, she never came and asked me questions after our initial tutorial session. No, she never voiced anything to me. Instead, she processed and came to the conclusion that I was cheating our techs – for no good reason.
And my heart broke when I was asked about it. My eyes watered at having my integrity so easily challenged. My temper flared at being so misunderstood – and then reported as unethical. And my office door slammed shut as the emotions wildly bounced around my brain.
I was not OK. Today, I am still struggling.
Being judged is hard. It makes you question everything you think to be true.
And then as I wallow, God taps me gently on the broken and hurting spots. And He lovingly whispers, “So now that you feel the sting, what will you do to deal with how YOU are judging others.” OUCH!
So now I have two issues to deal with – feeling judged and being judged. Where in the world do I start?
There are a few key reasons I need to start with my own judgmental heart.
- We are not the one true Judge
- Psalm 50:6 – Let the heavens declare His righteousness, For God Himself isJudge. Selah
- Isaiah 33:22 – For the Lordis our judge, the Lord is our lawgiver, the Lord is our king; it is he who will save us.
- 2 Timothy 4:1 – In the presence of God and of Christ Jesus, who will judge the living and the dead,and in view of his appearing and his kingdom, I give you this charge
- 2 Timothy 4:8 – Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.
- Hebrews 12:23 – to the church of the firstborn, whose names are written in heaven. You have come to God, the Judge of all, to the spirits of the righteous made perfect,
- We do not have a good perspective
- Isaiah 11:3 – His delight is in the fear of the Lord, And He shall not judge by the sight of His eyes, Nor decide by the hearing of His ears
- John 7:24 – Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment.
- John 8:15 – You judge by human standards …
- Hebrews 4:12 – For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.
- We are really no better at heart
- Ezekiel 16:52 – You who judged your sisters, bear your own shame also, because the sins which you committed were more abominable than theirs; they are more righteous than you. Yes, be disgraced also, and bear your own shame, because you justified your sisters.
- Micah 7:3 – That they may successfully do evil with both hands— The prince asks for gifts,The judge seeks a bribe, And the great man utters his evil desire; So they scheme together.
- Matthew 7:3-4 – 3 And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye?
- Acts 23:3 – Then Paul said to him, “God will strike you, you whitewashed wall! For you sit to judgeme according to the law, and do you command me to be struck contrary to the law?”
- Romans 2:1 – You, therefore, have no excuse,you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.
- Romans 3:23 – for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God
- It will come back to us
- Matthew 7:1 – Do not judge, or you too will be judged
- Matthew 7:2 – For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.
- Luke 6:38 – Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap.For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.
- Galatians 6:7 – Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap
Then I work on forgiveness. Because it is the key to life – “14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14-15). And I realize that if I cannot look at her next week and find grace, I am lost. I close the door on God being able to radically shower grace on me.
I have to work through the pain and betrayal … and allow peace to overwrite them. I have to let go of the anger and frustration … and allow forgiveness to redefine them.
Today, I am not there. Grace is still fighting the good fight to reclaim my heart for Him. So what hope do I have?
Psalm 23 – 1 The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, 3 he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. 4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. 6 Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
He is with me.
He is comforting me.
He is pouring out His goodness on me.
He is giving me an abundance of peace and rest to calm me down.
He is loving me back to wholeness.
So thank You loving Father that this one episode will NOT define or destroy me. Thank You gracious Father for Your goodness at work. I know I WILL get through this – and then past it. And I will be stronger, ready to the next battle. Thank You for Your hand on me every step of my life!
Marie Fremin. 2/24/18
Compromise
I was having dinner with a friend last night, and we started talking about dating among singles. And I mentioned that I find it interesting how we all have something we compromise about. That one area where we rationalize behavior and thinking we know is wrong even though we know God sets a clear standard in the opposite direction.
And I’ll say the same thing here I said last night: I’m not judging anyone else for his/her choices. I’m not pointing any fingers. I’m not calling out any names. I’m not questioning any specific behavior. I’m just acknowledging what I see to be true: even though we call ourselves Christ followers and profess to love God, we all have at least one thing or one area where we toe the line of righteousness. Where we know God says “no” but we choose to stop listening. Where we preach to others how God says to act yet we choose not to let our walk match our talk. Where we choose to do as we please instead of going the narrow way toward God’s best.
Ouch! It would definitely hurt less to have this conversation if I wasn’t throwing myself under the bus too. But I didn’t exclude myself then – or now. Sure, I could brag and say I’m honoring Paul’s reprimand in 1 Corinthians 6:18 and am therefore a good Christian girl. I could boast that I don’t take the Lord’s name in vain and regularly go to church (Exodus 20:7-8) and am therefore a good Christian example.
I could come up with a million ways to make myself feel good about the majority of my choices. But there will still be that one thing or area where I turn away from God’s goodness to do what makes me feel good, happy, whole, or stable.
Because no matter how good I am – or how good I “behave” – if I choose to do life my way instead of God’s way, it is sin in the form of compromise. And compromise is dangerous to my faith. Compromise draws me away from God’s presence. Compromise leads me away from God’s grace. Compromise steers me to challenge God’s truth.
Compromise opens the door for me to sin bigger and bolder without remorse or regret. Because compromise permits me to rationalize any and every choice according to my standards instead of God’s. One wrong choice leads to a bigger wrong choice, and the cycle continues until we are living life without care of God’s righteousness and will justify everything we do. Just like James warns us – “Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death” (James 1:15) and Solomon warns us – “There is a way that seems right to a man But its end is the way of death” (Proverbs 16:25).
But just because I can justify my choices to myself doesn’t mean I can justify my choices to God. Because one thing about His Word is that it is clear – God determines right and wrong and tells us exactly where the demarcation line is. Want to know if you living God’s way or justifying your behavior? Go to the Word and look HONESTLY at your choices. “For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12).
So what conclusion have I drawn from all this? Doing life God’s way brings the best rewards – but it requires the hardest and least likable choices (at times). It requires saying “no” to your flesh, “no” to your emotions, “no” to your hormones, and “no” to your comfort zones. It requires you making the difficult – or least pleasurable – choice now for best results later. It requires being fully respectful of yourself, the people you are in relationship with, and the people around you – in actions, in words, in choices, in thoughts. All of this plus more is what Jesus means in Matthew 7:13-14 – “13 “Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. 14 Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it.”
So compromise will come knocking. You have the choice to answer with welcoming arms and seemingly harmless choices – which will crack the foundation of your faith. Or you can slam the door shut and choose to live life God’s way – which will seal up your cracks and reassure you of His love. How will you answer?
Marie Fremin. 2/23/17
Marie's Hope 